School started and I was excited to meet new friends. In the beginning, Mom would bring me to school and drop me off in the front. My classroom was bright and my teacher was friendly. I played with new friends at recess and enjoyed watching Reading Rainbow and eating lunch that I didn’t have to fix myself. School became my safe space and I was always excited to get there and sad when the’d release us at the end of the day.
My 7th birthday was coming up and in my family, there was always a party for my birthday. We always had a house full of people and Chucky would come over and chase me and we would eat all of the cake harass all of our animals while our parents laughed and ate and drank in the kitchen. Everyone celebrated my big day. I started asking Mom very early about what type of party were going to have for my 7th birthday. I asked her if Dad was coming and if Chucky was coming. I told her about my new friends at school and told her I wanted to invite them. Mom assured me that we would have a great party, like always. She even let me pick out party plates when we went to the grocery store with matching napkins. They were pink with polka dots and rainbows. I cut out construction paper rings and hung them over the windows. In my mind, my birthday was everyone’s favorite day and there was no way my sister or my father would forget. I planned to invite Roxanne, whom I hadn’t seen since leaving Flour Bluff. Mom promised it would be great and everyone would be there. My birthday fell on a Saturday that year so there was no reason to postpone it.
On my birthday, it never dawned on me that Mom hadn’t cooked anything. In fact she wasn’t even home. She left for work that morning when I was waking up and left me a birthday card on the table. I cleaned the house while she was away, set out my pretty plates and napkins. The phone rang and I answered it anxiously. Mom said she was working longer than she thought. It was getting dark outside, I was alone. The phone rang again, Mom said she’d pick up dinner for me on the way home. She came home with a grilled cheese sandwich and fries form Dairy Queen. We ate and when I asked her about my birthday party she told me there wouldn’t be one. No one was coming. Dennis came over and they drank. Mom passed out on the couch that evening and I tried to snuggle up next to her. She never really hugged me or snuggled me so moments like this were the only time I had the nerve to steal affection. It was my birthday.
It never dawned on me until my birthday that the packages and letters from my Dad had stopped. I was not allowed to see Roxanne and I hadn’t spoken to anyone on the phone since we’d moved to Corpus Christi that summer. Later, I’d understand that Mom didn’t want anyone to know where we lived. She said that Mrs. Smith betrayed us. She wasn’t loyal. We had to stay safe and Dad couldn’t know where we were. I didn’t care what she said, I wanted to go home.
As Mom drank more, she would oversleep and I would have to wake her up to bring me to school. I was late almost every day. Some morning I couldn’t wake her up and I’d walk. Schanen Elementary was about 1 mile away and at 7 years old, that was a bit much. If it was too cold, I’d just wait for mom to wake up. The same went for after-school pick up. I’d wait and wait and most days, I would be the last kid waiting at school or at least it felt that way. In hindsight, I have no idea why I was not bussed but maybe our apartment on Everhart Road was too close to qualify for bussing.
When Mom would drop me off, the kids would tell me how pretty she was. I would tell them how handsome my Dad was too and that he lived in Louisiana. My teacher, of course, showed great concern with what was going on with me. When Mr. Dennis would drop me off at school and walk me in, I’d lie and say he was my dad if someone asked. I didn’t know how to explain Mr. Dennis. My teacher pulled me outside once after coming in late and asked me who I lived with and to explain more clearly what was going. I did my best and she sent me into the principal’s office to explain again. They were concerned. My teacher was also concerned about my schoolwork. I still could not see the board. In fact, I couldn’t see my teacher or my friends most of the time. She called my mother after having the nurse look at my eyes and suggest to her that I get glasses. My vision was so bad that the teacher made special papers for me because I couldn’t see what was on the board. She wrote everything down for me and let me keep it at my desk.
My Mom took me into the optometrist and after a few visits, they fitted me with big red glasses, like Steve Urkle. I loved them. I could see everyone and I could see the board. I was able to keep up with the kids on the playground when we played tag instead of losing them to the blur that would take over when they got too far away.
Saving Elizabeth 